Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Randomize
