Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
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