if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
