About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
Randomize