shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
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