Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
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