I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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