Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
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Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
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Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
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