Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Betty ford says i'm here all night
Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
