butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
