Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
