STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
Come see our sink grown plant.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize