check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
