Is it normal to miss your booty call?
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
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