I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream