Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Randomize