So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
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Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
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she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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