Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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