addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
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