I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
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