I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
how do flat chested girls get laid?
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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