white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
i love accidental penises.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
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