i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
