come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
I'm like, not good at living.
Randomize
