I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize