love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Dude, I woke up at my ex's house. I am spooning her half naked roommate. There is a pizza on my shoulder. I need you to come pick me up.
well I can't set my house on fire every night
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Randomize
