Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
Randomize
