Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize
