I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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