I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
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