Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
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