More tranny stories later!
We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
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