Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
Randomize
