3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
