i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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