he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
