Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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