WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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