I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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