just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize
