did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize
