so explain again why im purple
no
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
