Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
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