LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
Randomize
