She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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