I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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