So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
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i robbed the continental breakfast last night
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
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Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
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