I think i sorta joined a cult last night
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.