I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
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