I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
