they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
