Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Randomize
